When we think of the miracle of the Christmas Season, we always remember ‘A Christmas Carol’. Remember the Albert Finney version of the story? We watch it every year and sing along to the disturbing music. Now, this would never happen to us because we are good people who love everybody (except for the extremely stupid and bigoted but even those people we don’t wack with a bat). We’ll pray for their putrid souls but at no time will we support any legislation to kill them.  

          In Uganda, they are proposing legislation to put HIV/Aids infected people who are also homosexual to death and uninfected homosexuals will be imprisoned. Anyone found aiding and abetting a homo will also be imprisoned. Is it just us but has this gone a little too far? Has everybody lost their fucking minds? Come on, kill gay people who are infected? Why? What about the straight people who are infected?  

          So where did they get the idea? Oh yeah, it was an American Christian missionaries who told the Ugandan government that they had a therapy cure for homos and that their behavior was a choice. As if these fucktards weren’t causing enough problems here, we are exporting these Christians to spread their message of hate and bigotry across the lands. Maybe these Christians are our version of weapons of mass destruction. Maybe these Christians will be able to go from country to country and spread their venom until we are all hateful, nasty creatures who base all our scientific beliefs on the pseudoscientific methods of a middle school dropout with a chemistry kit.  

          This is like we have released SARS or H1N1 on an unsuspecting world. We should call the virus the HHCC (Homophobic Hateful Closeted Christians). Only a homophobe with repressed homosexual tendencies would travel the world spreading this crap. They say: ’Look at how compassionate I am and I’ll pray for your buggering soul’ but they mean: ‘I hate those gays and their throw pillows and lesbo ways. I just want to take them and …kiss them a lot….Nooooooooo.’  

          All we ask is this; can we stop these people now? They use to be funny but they are going way too far. Can we all forego our normal Christmas letter to Santa and ask the big guy to have his team of assassin elves take these fuckers out? We will be asking for just that. If you don’t join in the writing campaign, the elves may just send a strongly worded email for these bigots who hide behind the cross while Jesus shakes His head with shame for them.