THE Relationship Blog

lindsay lohan old 1 205x300 Life Change and Lindsay Lohan


Have you ever noticed how there are only two types of celebrity? The first type, or what we call the implosive type, have a tough time dealing with the attention and tend to turn to substances or serial relationships or breaking the law to deal with all the media. The second type seems, well, for lack of a better term, normal. Why is that? What makes some people freak out and others handle success differently? What makes Chachi normal and Cindy from Brady Bunch an alcoholic?

It’s all about change. The reality is that your body and emotional psyche do not register fame as much as they register lack of balance. The reality is there is no difference in your system from getting married and moving out and becoming a movie star. Both things are major life altering events. Sure, maybe in one, your picture is taken a million times more than the other but the flashing bulbs do not cause you to stress as much as what they mean. With fame comes money and change. With marriage comes life change and issues with money.

I know it’s hard to believe but our emotions register lots of money and no money almost the same. There is anxiety with lots of money. What do I do with it? How do I protect it? Am I doing the right thing for the future? Whereas no money has similar questions like: How do I get it? How am I going to make more of it? How will it be in the future? For those of us who have only really experienced the no money feeling, it is hard to see the other end of the spectrum but it really is there.

Thus we look at the child’s stars and wonder ‘What the hell happened to you?’

You have the indomitable Lindsay Lohan who just can’t seem to keep her head about water. She keeps making the same mistakes. She gets out of rehab and then allegedly steals a necklace and is at risk of spending a year in the pokey! And, after all that, she is seen clubbing in NYC!?! This child/woman gained celebrity in her early teens. She was a Disney darling. Remember the feud between Hillary Duff and Lindsay Lohan? Why did Hillary survive child stardom and Lindsay implode? Easy! Look at the families. Hillary received the support of her family and she took the time to create a brand of clothing. She is now a very successful young adult author, whereas Lindsay seems to have a fame whore family who will stop at nothing to be in the press. In her family, infamy is just as good as being famous.

Our pre-frontal cortex registers change. The pre-frontal cortex is also responsible for impulse control and insight and it is connected to the amygdala, or the fear center of our brain. When the pre-frontal cortex is overwhelmed, the amygdala takes over with fight or flight. So, when you have all this upheaval in your life like getting married or becoming famous, we either develop insights to deal with the changes or our impulse control gets overwhelmed and we either become belligerent or take flight by abusing substances. Easy, no?

So put down the bottle and deal with the changes that are affecting your life. Talk about them. The last thing you want is for the paparazzi to take a million pictures of you drunk on the street with your skirt over your head. Or maybe you do. Good luck with that.

sharebookmarx Life Change and Lindsay Lohan

lindsay1 300x226 IMHO, UCLA Fd Up


         Lee says:  There is something happening that is truly scary. The so-called experts are being swayed by the media and the consumer is left wondering whom to trust. We are left to wonder what kind of professional would induce, condone and allow a woman to bring to term 8 infants when she already had a gaggle at home. What kind of medical professional would allow a woman to undergo 10 plastic surgery procedures under general anesthetic for countless hours because she wanted it? And certainly, I am left wondering that when leading professionals minimize the severity of mental illness, what does that say to society for those suffering on a daily basis?

          I have mentioned before that I have worked for many years in the field of recovery. I have dealt with the court system and have on many occasions recommended jail time for failed drug tests or fought tooth and nail to have clients released to rehab. The enormity of this responsibility is nerve-wracking; knowing that you hold the life of not only the person in question but society as a whole in your hand is daunting. One slip up and that person whom you diagnosed and publicly defended can kill a car-full of kids or themselves! In this line of work, mistakes happen but the reality is that we tend not to over-extend ourselves with certainty and paint the canvas with broad strokes since it can come back and bite us in the ass.

          Apparently, the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior, and more specifically, the UCLA Neuropsychiatric Center, believe that they can say things with an air of willynillyness that most of us professionals eschew. Back in August, Lindsay Lohan was remanded to UCLA after her brief stint in jail for probation violation. Prior to her admittance into the esteemed lock-down program, it was revealed by probation that Lindsay regularly took Dilaudid, Adderall, Nexium, Zoloft, Trazodone and Ambien per doctor prescription. She had been, at some point, diagnosed with ADHD (thus the Adderall) and the court appointed psychological professional diagnosed her with Bipolar Disorder. After some time at UCLA, the professionals there concluded that she didn’t need 3 months of treatment. In fact, they argued that Lindsay had no issue at all with drugs citing that she had no withdrawal from them. According to TMZ “Our sources say Lindsay suffers from a personality disorder, which is all too common in society and sometimes partly the result of difficulties when growing up in Hollywood.” (8/19/2010)

          It is true that a diagnosis of true addiction to substances requires a withdrawal. However, since she had already spent two weeks in jail where you can assume that she took her meds as prescribed and not randomly and in excess, she may had already gone through some discomfort/withdrawal from the change in usage. There basis to discount addiction was not only, in my humble opinion, sloppy but downright unprofessional. This was a person convicted of DUI and Drug possession. She has had a very public issue with substances where she has been filmed on more than a dozen occasions under the influence. She has lost relationships, money, opportunity and career. And still, UCLA doesn’t see her substance use as a problem? And let me quickly address the flippant ‘personality disorder’ comment. If that is how a notable facility such as UCLA Neuropsychiatric Center sees personality disorders, it would behoove Hollywood to steer clear of them.

          The failure of multiple drug tests so soon after release is a symptom of something much bigger. Lindsay suffers from something that should have been obvious to the pros at UCLA. Apathy. None of what is happening is affecting her. I agree that she has a personality disorder and is a self-entitled little brat but behind all of this is an overwhelming sense of the indifference to her own consequences that alone should have been enough to warrant a deeper investigation into her psyche. I agree that she was misdiagnosed with ADHD and I do believe that she was over-medicated but not on the level of a Presley or Nicole. But cocaine was not prescribed and neither was alcohol.

          We can say Lindsay believes she is above the law and felt that she was untouchable. We can say that she has an over-inflated sense of ego and, paired with the sycophantic entourage that encourages this belief that the rules do not apply to her, she magically eludes consequences. Perhaps there is a loss of reality testing here that may have been hidden in previous evaluations and the original diagnoses of bipolar may hold up. Whatever it is, UCLA has dealt a blow to professional addiction specialists. In my opinion, their handling of this was shoddy and probably negligent. I guess I will probably never send them a resume now.

sharebookmarx IMHO, UCLA Fd Up

quaids 300x187 Celebrity Smackdown: Just Crazy

                Oh Smackdown, how I love thee. However, weeks like these that presents me with so many options for the smacking, I become overwhelmed like a fat kid in a candy store (or me with crunchy, savory things). Nonetheless, I must say something, right? I must address those who are begging for a love tap. I am beholden to my readers to lay ‘em down an smack ‘em yak ‘em.  As a wise person once said ‘Chump don’t want no help. Chump don’t get no help.’

                Randy and Evi Quaid: Can any facility open up some sort of padded honeymoon suite for these two whack-jobs?  There is only so many times that a person can get arrested before an intervention must take place. Maybe Dennis can give his brother a call. Perhaps Randy can have Evi carve a phone out of a skull and they can have a nice long chat. Randy, if you have any sense left you will hang up that skull phone and quietly leave the Motel you are staying. You know the one with the special aluminum foil and black paint that double for curtains and blinds. Evi chose that Motel to keep the Vienna Boys Choir from reading her thoughts. Good luck and stick to roles that will show off your naturally psychotic side.

                Lindsay Lohan: I have nothing to say. I predicted it, which makes me sad. Tune in for a really long post about this one.

                Mel and Oksana exchange emails: ‘I’m a f*&king’ failure’, Mel writes. Oksana responds with ‘Please don’t torcher urself like that, please!!!! U dint do anything to be so hard on urself.’ O.K., this exchange is coming from the couple who takes up 70% of the TMZ news feed on a daily basis. This poorly written response comes from the woman who has hired and fired every attorney and PR firm in L.A. at least once because people are just not willing to go up against a guy who smacks his own dislocated shoulder into place. That son-of-a-bitch is tough! Oksana, instead of riding around town hiring and firing attorneys, take a few spelling lessons or use a spell checker. I also love the explanation that it was written quickly and in abbreviated language ala texting. Sorry honey, but ‘torcher’ is someone who torches and unless Mel planned on committing self-immolation, you used the wrong word. Go ahead, Oksana, look it up. And don’t get me started on dint. What the holy hell is DINT?  

                Justin Beiber sucking face with some chick in the back of Honda: Well, apparently the Beibs is not following the Jonas Bros lead of purity ring even though it was explained to him that ass-play did not count. I am still not convinced he is male or that he has any talent other than tamed hair. Perhaps a DNA test or maybe even a letter from his gynecologist confirming his gender could convince me of this. I don’t get it even a little. And to the adult women who like the Beibs I seriously am worried about your eyesight, hearing and judgment. If liking the Jonas Bros and Taylor Lautner was creepy, liking this twink is tantamount to pure perversion. I like men, personally and this boy/girl won’t be clear on where he lands on the gender wheel for a while.

                There, just a little smacking to tide you over until next week where I will pull on my therapist cap and get medieval on some asses.

sharebookmarx Celebrity Smackdown: Just Crazy

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