Gay Marriage » CoupleDumb

WTF of the Week: Et tu Maine?

Nov 062009

Get used to it!

          We think we have been clear here, haven’t we? We think we have stated our position over and over again throughout our 10 months of posting. We are sure if you go over the WTFs you will find that more than half have been dedicated to the sheer stupidity and utter fuckery of the conservatives who feel that they have to take this country by the hand before we are engulfed in the flames of hell. Our only question is, WHAT THE FUCK MAINE?

          We were stunned yet cynically relieved that Maine repealed the Gay Marriage law on Tuesday. Relieved because stupidity is still alive and well and ultimately, the Save Marriage assholes are becoming what they fear the most. Let’s face it, we are a country of hypocrisy. We were forged out of revolution and as the oppositional defiant children of a greater country then quickly dominated the world. Today, anything remotely different terrifies us, especially if we are about accepting the second class citizens, and the mere concept of revolution must be squashed like a bug. Could all of this be the karma this country has dreaded for over 230 years?

          Listen Bible Thumping, Prejean Loving, Saddleback Approving, Bigoted Asses that hide behind a God that is so appalled by your words and behavior He is actually reconsidering the whole unconditional love thing. You have done this before and always lost. Go ahead and revel in the glory of this win but the precedent you are setting is not healthy. You are reversing laws. Do you understand that? Can you see the danger in that? Let us give you a hint: Today you can sleep safe in the smug knowledge that you guys are getting your way and the Silent Majority has let you push your Christian and homophobic agenda to the ridiculous. Tomorrow, when the Silent Majority speaks out and breaks the curse of this moniker, all of us are going after you. That’s right! Imagine waking up to find that white, Christian men can’t vote in this country? Or, that political action groups disguised as religious organizations lose their nonprofit status? Or better yet, wake up to find Carrie Prejean at a Lilith Faire concert singing an Indigo Girl song while burning a vagina candle with her wife, Ruth. Now that’s a good morning for us!

WTF of the Week: Interracial Couple Denied Marriage License

WTF of the Week

Oct 172009

OK, this is not really him but the resemblance is uncanny.

          We told you this would happen!!! We said if we let these fucktard wingnuts hijack the ‘morality’ of our country that blacks and women were next. Hell, we said it the other day! The following is yet another example of how some of the Vocal Minority are getting their way. Not through law but because this is what they believe.

          So the story is this; Justice of the Peace, Keith Bardwell (as seen above guarded by his sister/wife and mother/mother-in-law), in Tangipahoa Parish, Louisiana, denied a couple a marriage license. Now, of course, if the couple applying for the license was in some way violating the law we would understand this. Were they underage? Was one of them already married? Since we are talking about Louisiana, were they a same sex couple? No. It may surprise you that in today’s day and age some backwoods hick is denying an interracial couple a marriage license because he was concerned for their possible offspring. He also believed that in his experience and opinion, interracial marriages are doomed.

          We read this and something went sproing in our head. Oh my Tap Dancing Christ, we are so fucked in this country! Here, an elected official makes a judgment call about issuing a license not based on the law, as is his duty, but because he felt or believed that the children would be compromised since neither race accepts them. Bardwell will not marry an interracial couple based on his beliefs, not on any law.

          Oh, and please check out how this racist motherfucker digs his hole even deeper. The following is from his interview with the Associated Press: ‘I’m not a racist. I just don’t believe in mixing the races that way. I have piles and piles of black friends. They come to my home, I marry them, they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else.’ Sure they use his bathroom however, he doesn’t use that bathroom. And his white friends get to use the really nice bathroom. And isn’t that nice that he treats them like anyone else. Wow, that’s a telling sentence right there.

          Look, this is a slippery slope we are on. We sit by as the Vocal Minority does their ranting about the sanctity of marriage and how Gays will destroy that and quietly, in the swamps of Cajun Country, some banjo plucking elected official is denying marriage to interracial couples because mocha babies are just too much for him to handle. Listen, we are a mixed culture marriage and there are those out there that still think all Cubans are black. So maybe one day you will find that our love is forbidden too. Wake up Silent Majority, they’re coming to get you too!

Ask questions or face Paul's wrath

Reader's Questions

Sep 042009

d-and-d

Since we received no questions this week, we figured we would tell you some of the things that are important to us. But, in order to keep the format and not confuse any of you out there, we’ll write it like a question. WARNING: We better get some questions for next week or Paul will regale you with his different Dungeons and Dragons campaigns.

Gertrude from Idaho had a question: Hey Lee and Paul, I love your blog. It gives my life meaning in the middle of this harsh winter. I was wondering, other than being fabulous, what issues or topics are you passionate about?

Gertrude, thanks for the question. Paul and I are extremely opinionated, some would argue judgmental, so we have many topics that prick our interest and others that get us ranting. We will list some of them that are sure to piss off some of our readers. Here they are:

1. Equal Rights/Gay Marriage: Paul and I feel very strongly that all people are created equally.This includes that little twink wearing the size 1 jeans and the boa or the lovely woman in flannel with the mullet. They deserve the same rights, respect and protection under the law as any other person on this earth.

2. God is not a bigot: Stop pushing your agenda to oppress, hurt, repress, enslave and punish those different than you in the name of God. Paul and I believe that God is a fat, black lesbian but she loves you anyway.

3. Humor is important: If you immerse yourself in the doom and gloom of the news or the panic of the world, we are all fucked. Lighten up people! FYI: Perez Hilton, my fellow Cuban American, I love your site and read it like a fiending addict. However, stop reporting the lay-offs and other shit news of the day. It’s a bummer and you are feeding the negative energy beast. I see you as a rainbow beacon of light and it makes the hag in me all atwitter when you do your thing. Rock on Cubanito!

4. Misbehaving children: More specifically, having other people’s children enter our space bubble when we are out. If you are in a restaurant with your child, make them sit down! We have 3 kids and they learned early on that that behavior is unacceptable. They also know that we could live with 2 if they insist on their bad behavior.

5. Slow children: O.K., that sounds bad. What we mean are those kids who see a car coming and saunter to a side walk, making you stop for them. We have a group of kids down the street who play basketball and, on a daily basis, we have to stop for those little shits to get out of the way. Where are there parents? Why don’t they understand simple physics (two bodies can not occupy the same space)? Our only satisfaction is that the parents of these children who have been raised to feel the world owes them something, will be lamenting this when these kids never leave home.

So now you have a glimpse at us. Did we strike a cord? Did we piss you off? Write us. Comment. Ask us questions or next week be prepared to hear about how Paul obtained the Wand of Wonder back in 1987 during a two day campaign. That’s three bags of Doritos and a case of Dr. Pepper to a regular human.