THE Relationship Blog
Have you ever noticed how there are only two types of celebrity? The first type, or what we call the implosive type, have a tough time dealing with the attention and tend to turn to substances or serial relationships or breaking the law to deal with all the media. The second type seems, well, for lack of a better term, normal. Why is that? What makes some people freak out and others handle success differently? What makes Chachi normal and Cindy from Brady Bunch an alcoholic?
It’s all about change. The reality is that your body and emotional psyche do not register fame as much as they register lack of balance. The reality is there is no difference in your system from getting married and moving out and becoming a movie star. Both things are major life altering events. Sure, maybe in one, your picture is taken a million times more than the other but the flashing bulbs do not cause you to stress as much as what they mean. With fame comes money and change. With marriage comes life change and issues with money.
I know it’s hard to believe but our emotions register lots of money and no money almost the same. There is anxiety with lots of money. What do I do with it? How do I protect it? Am I doing the right thing for the future? Whereas no money has similar questions like: How do I get it? How am I going to make more of it? How will it be in the future? For those of us who have only really experienced the no money feeling, it is hard to see the other end of the spectrum but it really is there.
Thus we look at the child’s stars and wonder ‘What the hell happened to you?’
You have the indomitable Lindsay Lohan who just can’t seem to keep her head about water. She keeps making the same mistakes. She gets out of rehab and then allegedly steals a necklace and is at risk of spending a year in the pokey! And, after all that, she is seen clubbing in NYC!?! This child/woman gained celebrity in her early teens. She was a Disney darling. Remember the feud between Hillary Duff and Lindsay Lohan? Why did Hillary survive child stardom and Lindsay implode? Easy! Look at the families. Hillary received the support of her family and she took the time to create a brand of clothing. She is now a very successful young adult author, whereas Lindsay seems to have a fame whore family who will stop at nothing to be in the press. In her family, infamy is just as good as being famous.
Our pre-frontal cortex registers change. The pre-frontal cortex is also responsible for impulse control and insight and it is connected to the amygdala, or the fear center of our brain. When the pre-frontal cortex is overwhelmed, the amygdala takes over with fight or flight. So, when you have all this upheaval in your life like getting married or becoming famous, we either develop insights to deal with the changes or our impulse control gets overwhelmed and we either become belligerent or take flight by abusing substances. Easy, no?
So put down the bottle and deal with the changes that are affecting your life. Talk about them. The last thing you want is for the paparazzi to take a million pictures of you drunk on the street with your skirt over your head. Or maybe you do. Good luck with that.
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