9/11 » CoupleDumb

After 9/11 : We're sick but we can fix this

Sep 092011

THE Relationship Blog

30 years ago, I was sitting in school learning about the United States. Being the daughter of immigrants who fled their homeland due to oppressive communism, the love of our adopted country was rabid in my family. So, learning about how this great country became a great country was vital to my existence. Year after year in school, children learn layer upon layer of history. At first, you learn the basics, Columbus, the American Revolution, the Civil War then a brief mention of the big wars. As you get older, the curriculum is lined with the juicy interworking of government and intrigue. The pilgrims weren’t oppressed; they were tossed out for being separatists who wished to live away from ‘non-saints’ and purge their sinful ways. What really spurred the Revolution? Why assassinate Lincoln? But most importantly, why did the United States need so much encouragement to join the World Wars?

It took the sinking of the Lusitania and having German subs and U boats parked outside of New York to enter World War I and the bombing of Pearl Harbor to enter World War II. A bit drastic, no? Prior to this, our allies and other world powers are blowing each other up but as a country we insisted that that was their problem, not ours. History has proven time and again that like the original pilgrims, Americans are inherently isolationists. If it ain’t happening here, we don’t care. We have enjoyed this distance from the masses for decades; only getting involved when provoked. We are considered the greatest of the world powers and instead of wielding this power responsibly we have sat back and let our reputation speak for itself. And yet, historically, our country is also considered to be imperialistic. Regime change and invading much weaker countries is not something new to us. But we have always done this to further our agenda. Much like a parent who ignores their children until they interfere with their plans, the punishment we dole out has always been severe and swift.

So 10 years ago, our country suffered a devastating blow. We were attacked on our own turf. We were rudely woken from this dream that we were untouchable and invincible. Not only were we violated on our own land, they attacked two places that as Americans we hold sacred; Washington and New York. Washington, named after one of our fore fathers, the seat of our government and most importantly, our defense, and New York, the bad-ass part of our country’s personality and the seat of our financial dominance over the world were rocked with bombs in the shape of airplanes filled with our own people. These terrorists took something that as Americans we take for granted and used them to destroy the Pentagon and the World Trade Center. We could no longer pretend we were alone on this giant blue ball. We became aware of the hatred that the world had for Americans and that the shroud of democracy and freedom could be pierced by a fanatical sociopath. We lost our innocence as a nation and a people.

Our reaction to this was predictable. When human beings are attacked we resort to our most primitive state: fight or flight. The sympathetic and parasympathetic response to shock is always the same; I will either hide or kick some ass. Our country went into shock. For a brief moment we united as never before. Under the mantel of pain and disbelief, Republicans and Democrats shook hands and agreed to work as one for the good of the country. For a moment we put our differences aside; all races and creed, (minus Islam because we generalized to all) linked arms to fight the bad guys. One nation under God actually meant something, for a moment. We were at war.

10 years later, as the euphoria of the adrenaline from the shock of the attacks has dissipated, we are left with only the Post Traumatic Stress of the attack. We have whole sections of society at the ready for the next wave of attacks. These same people see everyone as the bad guy that does not look or sound or share their beliefs. Different is bad. Then there are those whose apathy is palpable. Our country is divided. We have people who want to return to the good old days of the 50s. They think of that time as the golden age of our country. That was a time when life made sense, women were in the kitchen and blacks knew their place. And their place was not in the White House unless they were serving one of the white presidents.

It isn’t the economy. It isn’t our defense. It isn’t whether you lean to the left or right. We are living in a sick country. Our pathology is playing out to something larger in the future if we do not stop and dialogue about how we feel. This sad anniversary should remind us that we are not the same as before. We need to discuss this and stop blaming everyone else for the deep seated sadness, distrust and pain this country has suffered. We need to unite and have a group session that lasts another decade to rid our collective unconscious of this paranoia and cynicism.

Many will read this and assume that I am anti-American, a Pinko, leftist, Birkenstock wearing, tree hugging communist who wants to destroy this country. I can assure you that I am not. I just wish I had a magic want to wish away the rampant bigotry and hatred that pervades everything that is happening today. I want something better for my kids than listening to people who think evolution is a far out theory and gays are barbarians. I wasn’t around in the 50s but I’m thinking it wasn’t like Happy Days at all. It was scary and oppressive for anyone that was different or non-conformist. Lest we forget what Santayana said, ‘Those who do not know their history are doomed to repeat it.’ The 50’s spawned the 60s. I am banking on the American spirit to rebound.

Celebrity Smackdown: Most of the US

Celebrity Smackdown

Apr 072010

Uncle Sam's a perv because I know what I do during private time.

          Remember the days of yore when we would smack down a celebrity at least once a week? Remember when we were allowed to rant and literarily assault pseudo famous people if they fell within the parameters of our chosen weekly theme? We do. But we’re different now. We are a kinder gentler CoupleDumb. It also doesn’t help the situation that the same celebrity douches keep doing the same things thus making the smacking quite redundant. This week though, we are trying something new. Today we are returning to smacking with one exception.

          Lee says: This week we are discussing the topic of ‘privacy’ and no one group is more deserving of a smack than the very population of this great United States of America. Yeah, that’s right! Imma be smacking the U.S.! You ask, ‘But Lee, do we all deserve to be roasted without the underlying respect?’ My answer is a simple yes.

          Since I was a child, I have heard our citizen’s harp about the privacy of each individual American and how we are special and how we are the best country in the world and how we are endowed with certain inalienable rights and how we are all super heroes and how we all have super powers… Well, you know what I’ve realized U.S.? We are all the same. We are all unique like everybody else and no we are not more special or deserve something that no one else gets and no we are not super-heroes with super-powers. We are just residents of this big mud-ball hurling through the universe like everybody else on the mud-ball.

          This being said, how do we deal with privacy in this country? Like everything else in this wonderful land, we treat privacy with the same schizo-dissociative- bi-polar personalities that we treat every other security issue. In other words, don’t mess with mine but violate everybody else’s. After 9/11, we were all stunned into submission and were willing to do whatever it would take to regain some semblance of normalcy and safety in this country. We were violated to our core when some bad people took advantage of our lackadaisical airport security, even though, throughout the world, the issue of terrorism was always ever-present. We were raped when these same bad men took over our skies and started raining airplanes on landmarks, even though in other countries they had been living with their countries air force pulling domestic duty for decades. After the new day that will live in infamy, we were willing to join the world and work together. We were humbled.

          With our newfound humility, we also suffered from post-traumatic stress. We were twitchy and reactive which is perfectly normal. We wanted to fight back. We wanted to protect ourselves and didn’t care about the cost. We all wanted to carry mace and brass knuckles. We all wanted to take self-defense classes and let pilots carry weaponry (yeah, just like cowboys of the tailwinds). How about we teach the flight attendance krav maga and how to use ice tongs to take out a terrorist? We also agreed as a country that all this respect for one another’s privacy is what caused a complete breakdown in government communication.

          One agency knew something. One agency knew something else. When all this info was put together, it became really fucking obvious something was going to happen. But we didn’t do anything because we don’t suspect and we don’t want to go back to that McCarthy era and we don’t want the CIA or FBI or Homeland Security or the po-po or the Feds or the Pentagon or the NSA or the Secret Service or the kid across the street who seems a little fucking paranoid and walks around with a notepad and a safety helmet on taking note as to our behavior and our strange ways. Because my privacy is important and don’t you dare check on me because I’m an American and I have rights and who the fuck are you Big Brother to be checking on me and my coming and goings and so what if I bought 100 pounds of fertilizer and what’s it to you that I have three bottles of clear liquid and tweezers in my carryon luggage Mr. TSA fuckwad and why do you care if I transferred money to this company that also supports small training facilities all over the world. I’m an American God Damn it. Don’t tread on me. And thus the humility is gone the way of the dodo.