THE Relationship Blog

On Monday we began to share the age old secrets of how to get the man of your dreams. Yesterday we shared more pearls of wisdom. Today, women are confused. What, there is no magic potion? Hip gyration? Or perhaps, Vulcan vagina grab that will bend a man’s will?

The answer is simply, no.

Yes, we have pulled a fast one on you. There are no simple rules or clever tricks to finding a man. Take a look at what we have written so far and you will see that these are not relationship tricks but attitudes of power and self-effectiveness.

Knowing this, here are the last three steps in our series on THE 10 WAYS TO GET A MAN!

8. Don’t think about it.

You knew we were going to say this. But stop thinking about the pink elephant. There is a huge difference between ‘I need a man’ and ‘I am ready for a man’. Can you see the difference? If you can’t then re-read all of our stuff and email Lee. If you can then stop thinking about it. If you are ready and available then your dream man will be coming through the door once traffic clears up.

9. Be the best woman you can be.

Everything else can be boiled down to this one rule. You just continue to be our awesome self and everything else will happen as God wills. This is simultaneously the simplest and hardest of the rules.

10. See yourself as he sees you.

Rule 10 is the big one. This is more than just finding someone to love. This is the nature of true love. Unless you live in a convent, there are men in your life. Unless you are a hermit, there are people in your life. And these people want to be around you. They have chosen you. See yourself as they see you. When Mr. Right comes walking through the door, see yourself through his eyes. Drink in how he loves those extra ten pounds that you hate. How he thinks that the way you snort when you laugh is cute.

If ‘being the best woman that you can be’ is summation of the rules then ‘seeing yourself as he sees you is the goal’. You see, the big lesson here is to love yourself. Enjoy yourself. Dance with yourself. When you do that, someone will want to cut in. Trust us.

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THE Relationship Blog

Life is too short to not have what you want. This is why CoupleDumb is sharing THE 10 WAYS TO GET A MAN! This list was found on stone tablets not too far from the Dead Sea Scrolls and the next cave over from the original blueprints to the ancient Thigh Master.

THE 10 WAYS TO GET A MAN! (#4-7)

4. Sweet like sugar is not bad, even for diabetics

Did your Mom ever tell you that you get more flies with honey instead of vinegar? Why do people find it hard to say nice things to each other? The job of a partner in a relationship is to support and the easiest way to support is to say nice things. No one is saying to lie. We are saying that complimenting him on things can go a very long way. Don’t be fooled. Men have shitty self esteem as well. Having a woman him that he is awesome is better than steroids.

5. Are your legs sturdy?

Men love women who can show their sensitive sides. However, men adore women who do not need to lean of a man for everything. You can hardly be in a relationship when you have no life yourself and the idea of hitching your wagon onto a man and making him hold you up is long past. Interdependency is the way to go. Two independent people who choose to be together and can depend on one another for love and support are awesome! If you need a piggyback ride to get around the house, you are not ready for any of this wisdom.

6. Is that your flock?

One of the top 5 reasons people break up is a direct result of family and friends meddling in their relationship. If you have poor boundaries with family and friends and they feel they can interfere in your relationship on your behalf then we hope you really love these people because you won’t be in a relationship for long.

7. Possession is 9/10^th of the law

This one is complicated. This one deals with passiveness of things and people. If you can’t let go of things you probably can’t let go of people. Being attached to things in your life is unhealthy. Why? Because you are investing your energy in something that cannot and will never validate your existence.  Some people operate as if their things in some way define them. If you are this kind of person, if you are possessed by your possessions, what room do you have for a relationship?

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THE Relationship Blog

What’s the secret? What are the fabled instructions on some stone tablets found in some cave in the Middle East that have been lost to time? What does a woman have to do, or be, to get the man of her dreams?

CoupleDumb has un-earthed some tablets with ancient writing on them. Luckily, we are fluent in many dead languages. These nuggets of advice have been hidden by tons of sand and a general lack of common sense. So, for the first time in modern history, THE 10 WAYS TO GET A MAN! (#1-3)

1. Make sure what you have to offer is worth a man…

Women are socialized differently. Through our parents, education and media, we get the message that we will be happy when we get a ring on our finger.  Many women have rebuffed this notion. In fact, whereas in the 80s, the number one priority of a single woman was to get married, today’s woman wants a good career! 88% of young single women are not interested in marriage, see it in the future but do not feel that it is necessary.  These are great breakthroughs but the result of this shift is an entire gender with poor socialization as to how to handle relationships. As women, we think our alternative to being altar focused would be to be whores.

Self-worth is a powerful aphrodisiac. A woman who is sure of herself, what she wants and where she wants to go is probably the sexiest thing for a man. If you believe in yourself, maintain your integrity and live your life without regret, you have more than enough to offer a man.

2. Junk in the trunk is one thing but do not haul a trailer…

If there is anything that turns off a man it is a woman with a past. We aren’t talking about being promiscuous. We are talking about women who allow their past to dictate their present. A man broke your heart once and now all men are pigs. You broke up with a guy and have had an on-again off-again affair. This speaks directly to grieving and having closure with people. Move on. New relationships do not need the playback on the bad relationships.

3. Do you know how to shoot straight?

If there is one thing a guy cannot handle it is a girl who plays games. Men are simple in nature and say what they mean and mean what they say. (Unless the guy is a complete pussy and if so, steer clear of him). Women, take a lesson from a man and say exactly what you want, what you need and what you think. Don’t couch it in innuendo, meta-messages and passive aggressiveness. Just say it!  He can’t read your mind so don’t expect him to.

Tomorrow we will unearth more of these pearls. Until then, aloha!

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