Real Relationship Advice
We can discuss relaxation or relieving anxiety week after week without needing to repeat ourselves. However, none of this information will make a difference if you continue to overwhelm yourself. Society has put greater pressure on us to be multitaskers. We value individuals who are able to juggle more than a couple things at a time. We revere them. However, is a world full of multitaskers a good thing? How does that affect your ability to relax?
There was a study conducted a few years ago at Western Washington University. The study was very simple. Random students were asked whether they saw anything unusual when they walked across the University quad. Only 25% of those walking through the quad while speaking on their cell phone noticed a clown riding around the campus. In other words, the ones who were multi-tasking were not paying attention. We often wonder if the surge of ADD is not a question of over-whelming and over-stimulating the system rather than a true inability to pay attention.
The only way to create a life of manageable stress is to start out with a life that is not unmanageable. We take on projects with an eye on the outcome without thinking about the time consumption. We keep heaping more on our ‘to do’ pile without regard to how another impending deadline will affect us. The truth is that we are creating our own misery. We are choosing to be overwhelmed. We are choosing to be drowning in deadlines and be mediocre to disappointing in performance.
Moms tend to be a culprit of this behavior. It is expected of us to do a million things and still volunteer our time in our child’s classroom. We are expected to care for our children, husband’s and home and have a life of our own where we join book clubs or workout or have a girl’s nights and do carpools, Dr.’s appointments, play-dates, Mommy and Me, lactation seminars, healthy snacks for soccer, reading time in our child’s class and bake gluten free cupcakes for our daughter’s American Girl Club. A Mom’s life is no longer that of a caretaker but more of a personal assistant/chauffer/chef who keeps everyone’s schedules, maintains the dietary management of all family members, drives more miles than your average cab driver and still open’s herself to more responsibility.
It is no wonder that Moms are taking anxiety medication to get through the day. It is no wonder that women are drinking more today than ever before. It is no wonder that more Moms are seeking out help with stress than ever before. However, no matter how many yoga classes you take, it will not manage your stress if you need to rush out of a downward dog position to go make crafts for your 10 blog post of the week. Too much is just that.
It takes a good woman to handle everything that life throws at you. It takes a great woman to say, ‘no, I do not have the time for that.’ Make yourself the priority of your schedule and your stress will become manageable before you need to bake another batch of nut-free carob chip cookies.